


Stray Cat

by Boogum



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Because this poor kid needs some love, Episode: s03 Desperada, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Identity Reveal, Lonely Adrien, One-Shot Collection, Post-Episode: s03 Papa-Garou | Weredad, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Sabine is best mum, Season 3 Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-15
Updated: 2019-09-06
Packaged: 2019-10-10 17:28:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17430341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Boogum/pseuds/Boogum
Summary: Even a stray just wants a place to feel welcome sometimes.





	1. Stray Cat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just gonna dip my toes into this fandom. Should warn I refer to 'Papa Garou' (S3, ep. 2) in this one, so maybe don't read if you don't want to be spoiled.

He loves the freedom of being Chat Noir. He can jump high enough to graze the sky with his fingertips, taking him over buildings, over entire suburbs. It's like breaking from a cage, like discovering a world with no borders. He can go wherever he wants, be whoever he wants. But sometimes he catches families on the street or in their homes—warm, happy, _together_ —and the old ache starts up in his chest.

Freedom is nice, but it doesn't change the fact that pumpkin time always comes with a flashing beep of his ring. It doesn't change the fact that he always has to return to looming walls and oppressive silence, to a table set for one and the sound of his own footsteps echoing all around. His home might as well be in an eternal state of winter for all the warmth he finds there, though Plagg makes it a little more bearable.

"Chat Noir?"

He misses his footing and ends up landing ungracefully in front of Sabine Cheng. Heat tickles his cheeks. It's only been a day since the disastrous meal when he broke Marinette's heart and accidentally got her dad turned into an akuma. The memories are awkward and stick to him like a stubborn stain, but he supposes it all turned out okay in the end. Kind of.

"Sorry, did I startle you?" she asks.

He hastily gets to his feet. "Not at all." He sweeps a bow (because superheroes should be gallant) and flashes a smile. "It's nice to see you again, Madame Cheng."

She stays to talk to him. She actually asks about his day. Most civilians don't bother with such mundane things, but then this is Marinette's mum. She's just as warm and kind as her daughter. He can't resist lingering, can't resist enjoying in this simple moment of interaction.

Even a stray cat just wants to be given attention sometimes.

They're still talking when his stomach grumbles. Loudly.

"Do you want to come in?" Sabine asks, shifting the bag strap on her shoulder into a more comfortable position. "Uh, if you have time that is. Sounds like you could do with a bite to eat."

"Oh, I couldn't trouble—"

"Please. After all my Tom put you through, it's the least I can do."

He shifts on his feet, rubs the base of his neck. "Um, if it's okay with you then …"

"Of course."

Adrien follows her inside the bakery, tail hanging low. A part of him knows it's not a good idea to get too involved with this family while dressed as Chat Noir (even if Marinette did say they could be friends despite how he rejected her), but all the little excuses that pile onto his tongue never make it past his lips. Tom has already spotted him and then his big arm is around Adrien and they're pressed close, and Adrien just doesn't know how to react. He can only stiffen and smile that frozen smile of panic and awkwardness, even as he relishes in the contact.

Adults don't behave this way. At least not the ones back home. Nathalie is cool and clinical, his bodyguard is, well, his bodyguard, and his own father is more of a ghost that only appears to give orders and reprimands. Adrien doesn't know how to deal with this level of loudness and welcome and warmth, but that doesn't mean he doesn't enjoy it either. That doesn't mean he actually wants to leave.

He is so, so lonely.

He tells himself he'll only stay a little while.

Sabine and Tom take him up to their home, having already intended to close the bakery temporarily for their break, and feed him with delicious pastries and food until he can't fit in another mouthful. Both touch his shoulder often, their smiles bright and warm and so achingly genuine. Marinette is lucky. He can imagine all the happy meals she and her parents share together around this table. She doesn't have to worry about closed doors and endless silence. She doesn't have to worry about finding a spot on a schedule just to have fifteen minutes with her father.

A lump forms in his throat, constricting, but he swallows it back. Chat Noir is a superhero, and in the end that's just another image he has to protect.

Probably.

He's not actually sure how superheroes are supposed to act (the comics only suggested he make a lot of puns and dramatic entrances), but he's pretty sure getting teary-eyed and confessing he's lonely to Marinette's parents isn't high on the list. If he's being honest, even if he were sitting here as Adrien Agreste, he'd be too shy and ashamed to utter such words.

"Is something wrong?" Sabine asks.

He blinks and realises his descent into less cheerful thoughts must have come through even with the mask. Colour tinges his cheeks and he quickly stands up from the table. "I just, uh, realised I have to, uh, go do a … thing."

Smooth.

Sabine smiles. "Of course. We won't keep you."

Tom looks as if he actually would like to keep him. The big man renews his offer to teach Adrien the trade of baking. That makes the lump come back in Adrien's throat, but somehow he manages to swallow it down again, even if his voice is a bit huskier when he says he really can't—protecting the streets of Paris is a fulltime job and all.

"Well, you're still welcome here any time," Sabine says.

"That's right." Tom stands up and slings an arm around him again. "Our doors are always open."

Adrien knows they mean it. It's in the way Sabine presses his hand between hers and Tom pushes more macarons on him. It's in the way they walk him to the door and wave goodbye, calling out for him to be careful and hoping that he'll get home safely. (What would they say if they knew what he dreaded most was what awaited him at home?)

He forces a smile and sweeps into another Chat Noir bow. Then he extends his baton and vaults up onto the rooftops, jumping and leaping away with all the freedom that Plagg's magic gives him. It's like fleeing from a sanctuary into the cold, like throwing away something precious, and the loss hits him hard.

He tells himself he can't go back.

He already knows he will.


	2. Safe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was inspired by fairymathilda's prompt on tumblr: "I love that Adrien can purr when transformed, so could you maybe do some Marichat where Mari kinda starts petting him absent-mindedly and he purrs?" I also love this little cat quirk of Chat Noir's, so I could not refuse such a prompt.

Her room is soft pink sunshine and warmth. Very Marinette. There are pictures of him—or at least his civilian self—taken from various magazines and pinned to her wall, but he already knows she's a fan of Adrien Agreste, and he's seen the pictures so many times now that he barely spares them a glance.

He and Marinette have been doing this for a while.

No, no, no! Not like that! Marinette is a friend. A dear, wonderful friend. But somehow she's managed to become Chat Noir's friend as well, and he's really grateful for that. These nights where he can sit with her and just talk and talk and talk have become some of the best nights of his life. Sometimes the two of them play video games, sometimes the whole family gets involved and there are messy, joke-filled bake-off challenges down in the kitchen. (Adrien especially loves these nights; he and Sabine make an awesome team).

But then there are also nights where he and Marinette don't say much to each other at all. If he's being honest, these ones just might be his favourite. There's no pressure, no expectations, not even to maintain his Chat Noir persona. He can just enjoy her company in her pink sunshine room and _relax_.

Tonight is one of these nights. Her parents are out for their "date night" and she has a project to complete. Marinette being Marinette, she doesn't tell him to go away but simply welcomes him inside, sets him up with a mountain of snacks, and then gets stuck back into her crafting. He soon joins her on the floor, handing her brushes or whatever else she needs, but otherwise he's mostly a spectator to her creativity. They learnt the hard way how much he sucks at anything involving scissors, glue and paint.

Time passes with a lazy ease—at least for him. She gets into that extra-focussed zone where he knows she's half-forgotten he's there, but it doesn't bother him like it does with his father. Marinette is always willing to share the same space as him. When she does look up and catch his gaze, she smiles in warm delight, like she's just so pleased to be reminded he is there. His father has never done such a thing. In the rare times Adrien even gets to be in the same room as his father, the look he most often receives upon being noticed is one asking why Adrien is still there, followed by a swift dismissal.

It's no wonder he prefers to spend his nights in Marinette's home whenever he can.

Rain starts to pitter-patter softly outside. The sound is soothing, much like the little skritch-scratchers of her pen or the crispness of scissors sliding through paper. He stretches out on his stomach next to her and props his chin on his folded arms, content to watch her create. His tail gives a few lazy flicks before settling. Everything is lulling, everything so warm and comfortable. His eyelids droop.

"Look at you," she says in an amused tone. "You really are like a cat."

He hums in agreement, too wrapped up in sleepy contentment to make a better response. She laughs and the gentle skritch-scratch of her pen starts up again. A moment passes before her fingers slip into his hair, brushing against his ears and petting him as if he really is some soft-coated feline curled up at her side. Adrien doesn't mind this new form of affection between them. In fact, he leans into the pets, eyes still closed.

A low yet very distinctive purr escapes him.

Marinette's fingers still. "Oh."

Brow furrowing, he bumps her palm with his head, nuzzling a little as if to say _more, please_.

"Silly kitty," she says with a laugh, but she obliges and his purrs soon hum between them in a steady, peaceful rhythm.

Safe.

That's how he feels. Safe and warm and welcome. Marinette's touch is everything in that moment. He's content to indulge, to let his cat instincts express what he's still too shy to say in human words. Not that she seems to mind. She pets his hair for a long time, perhaps just as content to listen to him purr.

The whole night is pretty much perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I almost wrote "purrfect", but that would have killed the mood I was going for, haha.)


	3. A Hero's Duty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is based on art made by yunyin on tumblr. I loved the idea of Sabine substituting for Chat Noir so much that I had to write a story about it. (Even though I've probably taken a different approach to what was intended with that art piece.) I'm also placing this one when only Queen Bee, Rena Rouge and Carapace were active.

His vision dances with stars and blurry splotches. That last blow definitely broke something (or a few things). It hurts to breathe, hurts to move, just hurts, hurts, _hurts_. But he can't stay on the ground. He has to get up. Has to. Ladybug is counting on him. Everyone is counting on him.

"Come on," he grits through his teeth. "Come on, Chat Noir. Get up."

He presses his hands to the pavement, tries to lift his body up, but pain stabs like the blade-tipped fingers of a giant digging in and wrenching. He collapses again. More stars and splotches, more spinning and pain.

He wants to cry.

This can't be happening. Not like this. Not when Ladybug is trapped and needs him _right now_.

"Chat Noir? Oh my goodness."

A choked sound manages to squeeze past the burning, constricting thing that's formed in his throat. He knows that voice. Sabine Cheng kneels in front of him, hands hovering anxiously as if she's not sure if she should touch him. He probably looks a mess.

"You're hurt," she says.

"I'll be okay, but you need to go. It's too dangerous here."

He tries to stand again, but a harsh cry escapes him and gravity takes hold. Strong arms catch him. He winces and bites his lip so he won't scream, because even that mild impact is enough to make him almost blackout.

Sabine cradles him to her chest, half holding him on her lap. "Young man, you are in no condition to be fighting."

His vision blurs, but it's not with stars and splotches this time. It's wet, prickling hot, and leaves moisture running down his mask and cheeks. "There's no one else." He trembles, swallows down the shameful sounds trying to crawl free. "Ladybug needs me. I'm her partner, I'm supposed to support her, and I … it's my fault she's … I have to …"

"Shh." Sabine brushes a tear from his bruised, throbbing cheek and looks into his eyes. "Listen, I know you're a superhero and this is your job, but unless you've got a miracle cure of your own, I don't think you'll be going anywhere."

He squeezes his eyes shut, face screwing up in distress. The truth stings worse than his wounds.

"Is there anything I can do to help you?" she asks.

He's about to say no, but then he looks at her. _Really_ looks at her. This is Marinette's mum, the same woman who welcomed him into her home and has lavished him with kindness ever since. She's compassionate, protective, and, as he recalls from a certain reality TV show, knows how to use a staff-like weapon.

His heart thumps. Could he … did he dare?

She tilts her head. "Chat?"

It's not his place to bestow miraculous. Ladybug has always been the one to do that, and as far as he knows there's no one left he can turn to. Rena Rouge, Carapace, and Queen Bee have already been taken down. He doesn't even know where Ladybug gets the miraculous from (though he's putting his money on Master Fu having something to do with it.) But none of that matters, because right now he can barely move, there's no one else, and Ladybug needs help _immediately_. Everything is over if she loses her earrings.

"There is something you can do," he says, mouth dry and his heart thumping faster and faster. "But I … I'm not sure if I should ask you."

"What is it?"

"I … I can …"

He bites his lip, rubs his gloved finger along his ring. Should he do it? Should he ask her to take his place? This would expose everything. His civilian identity, his kwami, potentially make it impossible for him to be Chat Noir ever again.

But Ladybug is in trouble. Ladybug needs Chat Noir.

Fresh tears prickle. "Will you take my place?"

Her eyes widen. "W-what?"

"Will you take my place as Chat Noir? Will you help Ladybug?"

_Please._

He doesn't say the word, but she must see it in his eyes. The sheer desperation, the fear.

Her expression steels and she clasps his hand. "Of course. Tell me what I need to do."

A shaky breath. "Plagg, detransform me."

There's a flash of green and his mask and suit fades away. Plagg flutters weakly to the ground. Pain slams like a sledgehammer into Adrien's nerves and he groans, blinking back stars. Right, the suit helps him to contain physical damage.

"It's you," Sabine says, looking down at him with soft but concerned eyes. She smooths some of his hair from his face. "You're Marinette's friend, Adrien."

He can't help the tears that roll down his cheeks, but he also can't let himself fall apart now. He pulls the ring off his finger and shoves it into her hand. "This … this is my miraculous. Plagg can … Plagg will …"

"Plagg?"

The little kwami flies over, barely acknowledging Sabine. He only has eyes for Adrien. "Kid," he says, more like a sigh.

"There's cheese … in my pocket. Get … get your strength …"

"I know, kid. I know what to do."

Adrien closes his eyes.

Moments later, there's another flash of green and Sabine leans over him in the leather suit, cat ears and tail in place. She keeps fading in and out of view.

"Hold on, Adrien," she says, leaning down to caress his cheek. "This will be over soon."

oOo

"Miraculous ladybug!"

The magic flows and all the destruction caused by Mayura and the akuma is reversed. Adrien dashes out of the little side street and sees Sabine do the obligatory fist bump with Ladybug. The other superheroes crowd around her. He can hear them asking what happened to Chat Noir—the boy one—but Sabine is graceful in deflecting their questions and soon makes her escape.

Adrien heads back to where she had left him. Sabine arrives not long after, tucking the baton into its holster. Without a word, she closes the distance between them and pulls him into a hug. His arms instinctively wrap around her.

"Plagg, detransform me," she whispers.

Green flashes and the magic comes undone, but she doesn't let go of Adrien. She hugs him tight enough to hurt his ribs, tight enough to make his eyes sting and prickle. Being held by her is like being enfolded in love and warmth. How did she know this is exactly what he needed?

"Thank you," he says, or more like croaks. The lump is back in his throat. "Thank you for helping her. Thank you for—"

"I didn't just do it for Ladybug." She pulls back and presses the ring into his hand. "I did it for you."

His fingers tremble as he takes the ring.

"I'm glad I found you, Adrien. I'm glad I could help you." She smiles and cups his cheek. "You're a brave boy, and you've been a good friend to my Marinette. This was the least I could do."

He ducks his head shyly but hesitates to put on the ring. Just the thought of doing so makes his stomach twist.

"What are you waiting for, kid?" Plagg asks.

"I … should I even be wearing this now? I broke the rules and—"

"Rules schmules. You're my bearer and if anyone has any problems with that, they'll have to take it up with me."

Adrien's gaze darts up in surprise.

"No need to give me that face," Plagg says gruffly. "Who else can provide me with so much quality cheese? Baker lady here can't."

A strangled laugh escapes Adrien. "Right. Of course you just want to stay for the cheese."

"Of course."

Except when their eyes meet they both know that isn't true. Judging by Sabine's smile, she's seen through the lie as well.

When she's about to leave, she pulls Adrien once more into a tight hug. "You ever need help again, you just let me know. And you're always welcome in my home, okay?"

He burrows his face into her shoulder, making a small sound of affirmation.

She pulls back and nods to Plagg, who grins and dips into a little bow. Adrien sighs once it's just him and his kwami left.

"Is this really okay, Plagg?" he asks.

"Ehh, it'll be fine. She's a good one. We can trust her not to expose your identity."

"Yeah." His lips curve into the smallest of smiles. "I think you're right."


	4. Partners

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a warning that there will be major spoilers for the 'Desperada' episode in this one-shot. Also will be dealing with PTSD and some pretty heavy stuff. (But I won't leave you with all hurt and no comfort.)

Adrien wakes drenched in sweat. His hand is already reaching for his wrist, fingertips brushing bare skin. It's over. It's _over_. There's nothing to feel there. But his heart skitters and rolls like a clumsy, frantic thing. His chest is too tight. All he sees and hears is a spiralling chaos of gold flashes, trumpet sounds, and Ladybug vanishing over and over and over and over …

"Kid." Plagg's voice comes to him, muffled like its trying to work through stuffed bundles of wool just to register. "Kid, breathe."

Adrien shudders, tears spilling down his cheeks because it's too much, too much, and he can't _breathe_ , and—

"Come on!" Plagg hovers right in front of his face. "Kid, look at me. Look at me, okay?"

Adrien manages to focus on the glints of green eyes in the dim light.

"Breathe with me," Plagg encourages. "Just follow me. Ready? In"—a deep inhale—"and out. Come on, you're not breathing with me."

It takes a painful amount of tries before the steel tightness crushing Adrien's lungs releases its grip. He slumps against his pillow, his whole body limp. Fresh tears prickle his eyes. His mind is still a mess of nightmares and memories, but at least it doesn't feel like he's caged in them. Reality has him, at least for now.

"Hey," Plagg says in a heavy tone. "Listen, kid …"

Adrien winces. He knows that tone.

Plagg sighs and settles on his shoulder like a tiny bundle of warmth. "You know what? Never mind. I'll sit with you for now. Just remember to take deep breaths, okay?"

Adrien closes his eyes and swallows against the raw lump in his throat.

It's been two weeks.

He's still failing.

oOo

Concealer hides the bruise-like shadows under Adrien's eyes and a smile perfected long ago helps to mask the rest. He is good at putting on an image for the public. Or was. It's harder now. There are bathroom stalls to hide in when the dam breaks and panic and memories flood. There are lies to be offered, excuses to throw up like a shield, but nothing seems to stop his grasp on reality from slipping.

Almost three months. 25,913 failed attempts.

He's the only one who remembers.

He doesn't know how to move on.

He _can't_.

"Adrien?" Marinette says a bit tentatively when she finds him curled over on a bench, arms wrapped around himself as if he's some cracked Humpty Dumpty trying to hold all the pieces together. "Are you … are you okay?"

He forces himself to straighten. Forces a smile worthy of Paris's largest billboard. "I'm fine. Think I just ate something at lunch that didn't agree with me."

"Do you need to see the nurse? I could—"

"No. No, it's fine." He stands up and places his hand on her shoulder. "It'll pass. Come on, let's go to class."

She seems reluctant to let the conversation drop, but she also doesn't argue. It's only when he's alone again that he lets himself fall apart.

The attacks are getting worse. More frequent. It feels as if he's stuck in a loop again, his anxiety feeding on itself like a beast that can never be satiated.

Couldn't save Ladybug. Can't put himself back together. Even being Chat Noir has become like navigating a minefield.

"I should have listened to you," he sobs to Plagg after a particularly bad attack. "I should have never accepted the snake miraculous."

Plagg doesn't say he told him so. Hasn't done so since the first night when the numbness, adrenaline, and relief wore off and cracks splintered Adrien into the mess he is now. Somehow, that only makes Adrien feel worse.

He twists the silver ring round and round on his finger.

25,913 failed attempts. 25,913 times he let Ladybug, Plagg, and all of Paris down.

oOo

"Why don't you just say it?" Adrien asks one day. "We both know I'm not fit to be a miraculous holder, and I—" hot prickles sting his eyes—"I don't want to put Ladybug in danger."

A heavy sigh. "Kid …"

"You can give the ring back to Master Fu and find a new holder, and then—"

"I won't."

"Why not?" Adrien doesn't mean the question to come out so angry, but it does. "Wouldn't you rather have a bearer who isn't a liability?"

Plagg gives him a sad look. "You're not a liability, Adrien."

"How can you say that when you see me like this? I can barely keep it together when we're fighting akumas. I can barely keep it together period."

"But you do, and you know what that tells me?"

A slight shake of the head.

"It tells me you're stronger than you think. It tells me you're the perfect person to be my bearer."

Wetness trails down Adrien's cheeks. "You can't mean that."

"Adrien, you protected Ladybug and Paris 25,913 times all on your own."

"But I didn't. Those were failures. I messed up every time and—"

"Survived long enough each time to enact second chance."

Adrien blinks. He's never thought of it like that.

"That's some real bravery and determination there, kid. Granted, 25, 913 uses of second chance in one go was extreme and I never, ever want you to do that again, but your heart was in the right place."

"But I'm … like this. I'm a mess, Plagg. You have to see that."

"I know, kid. I know. And if you really think you can't do it anymore, I guess there's nothing to be done, but ..."

"But what?"

Plagg looks off to the side, fidgeting. "It just wouldn't be the same with someone else."

"Oh, Plagg."

Adrien gathers the cat kwami into his hands and holds him close. Soft fur tickles his cheek. Plagg gives him little nuzzles and a purr soon hums from the kwami, low and steady and soothing.

"Do you really think I can do this?" Adrien whispers. "Do you think things will ever go back to how they were?"

"I don't think it'll be easy, but one thing I can promise is that you won't have to do it on your own. We're partners too, remember?"

Adrien hugs him closer. "Yeah. We are."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was meant to feature Ladrien, but it just didn't fit. I might write a little companion piece for this one though that will focus on Ladybug and Adrien.


End file.
